Fixing Fall's School Uniform

With the temperature dropping to glorious, chilly lows, I find it only appropriate to post a warning about cold weather clothing. Although this trend hasn't reached epidemic-like levels yet, I know it will. After all, it isn't that cold in St. Louis yet.

But eventually, it will be, and eventually, this will happen. Sigggghh. Because this always happens.

The North Face Jacket + Expensive Leggings + UGG boots. It's expensive, it's ugly, and it's way too common. I understand each piece separately, kind of.. Leggings are good when worn under things; they're warm and more comfortable than tights. North Face Jackets and UGG boots are made to be practical, warm, and durable. Alright, that's fine. I get it.

But seriously, this is just trashy and wrong. It doesn't look good. You don't look hot. How did this become the university uniform of the majority of campuses between October and March?

I have four guesses, and I think they're all sort of right.

1. These girls are "too tired" to put together a real outfit
2. These girls "want to be comfortable"
3. These girls want to look identical
4. These girls want to show off how foolishly they spend money

Now let's break this down, piece by piece. Being "too tired" every day is the same as being lazy. I have no sympathy for you. "Wanting to be comfortable" is a cheap shot made by damn near half of everyone. It's an okay line when you're explaining why you don't want to rock stiletos on a walking tour. It's not an excuse for never getting dressed. The vast majority of clothing can be comfortable if you find the right fabric and the right fit. As it turns out, oversized fleece is neither of those things. I don't have much of an explanation for the last two reasons, as I think they stand alone pretty well. Sad, right?

To add to the humor, I see this look often worn with a bed hair bun (I assume to combat the static caused by the fleece), impeccable make-up, and fancy earrings. I would have added all of that in, but I think this is funny/awful enough as it is.

You know what's coming now. It's the second part of the glorious this-or-that. As it turns out, there is a whole lot more you can buy with $400. Go fucking figure.

Wanna bitch that this isn't as good as your craptastic outfit? Bring it.

The Gap coat is wool (ahem, warmmm) and done in a timeless shape, making it appropriate for every occasion. The scarf/glove set is warm and cute (notice the bow detail!), but practically priced at $7.50 from Forever 21, as gloves tend to go missing. Next we have the peachy-colored sweater dress by Silence & Noise, found at Urban Outfitters, which more likely than not would feel like being wrapped in a blanket. The dress can be belted with this adorable Top Shop belt, which adds a touch a whimsy. Underneath there are leggings that are $12 for a 2-pack paired with slouchy boots, both from Target. And, because $400 is so much money, there was leftover cash for designer accessories. The Betsey Johnson earrings play off the shiny hardware of the belt and the color of dress, while the Fossil bag adds another neutral to round off the look.

Oh yeah, and everything I found was regular price, so clearly I could have done better if I had wanted to.

Way to fail, rich girls.